You have 0 things

You have 0 stuff

You are 0 smart

You have lived 1 lives

There are 0 underps

You have 0 fat derps

You have 0 bark

You have 0 logs

You have 0 sticks

You have 0 vines

You have 0 apples

You have 0 goop

You have 0 meat

You have 0 axes

You have 0 houses

You have 0 crushers

You have 0 rock gatherers

You have 0 tree choppers

You have 0 craftsderps

You have 0 study derps

You have 0 warderps

You have 0 ungoop

You have 0 statues

The things have 0 loyalty in you

Gather stuff
Upgrade thing creation rate for 1 stuff
Upgrade stuff gathering rate for 1 things
Ponder what stuff and things are
Realize that the creepy derpy cat thing at the top of the screen is you
Kill yourself with 1 stuff because you are too creepy and derpy
Kill yourself with 1 axe because you are too creepy and derpy
Get reborn as another creepy derpy cat thing
Study 1 stuff
Study 1 things
Ask for knowledge from the derpy lion in the afterlife
Throw 1 rock at a tree
Crush 1 derp with 1 rock
Crush 1 fat derp with 1 rock
Feed 1 derp with 1 apple
Chop down 1 tree
Train 1 derp with 1 meat to gather rocks
Train 1 derp with 10 meat to chop trees
Train 1 derp with 20 meat to craft vine axes in 1 house
Train 1 derp with 40 meat and 10 smarts to study rocks
Train 1 derp with 10 meat to kill underps with axes
Make 1 axe with 1 rock, 1 stick, and 1 goop
Make 1 axe with 1 rock, 1 stick, and 1 vine
Make 1 house with 500 logs, 2500 bark, and 50 goop
Make 1 machine to crush fat derps using rocks with 50 logs and 10 vines
Distract the underp pinning you down by throwing an axe
Try to kill an underp with an axe
Abandon 1 derp
Build 1 statue of yourself with 100 ungoop
Sarcastically declare yourself god of the derps with 100 loyalty
Pretend to reincarnate yourself for 10 loyalty

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